Your hometown newspaper has taken to calling you "Senator Gone." You've got one of the worst attendance records in the United States Senate.
Now, in my capacity as vice president, I am the president of Senate, the presiding officer. I'm up in the Senate most Tuesdays when they're in session.
The first time I ever met you was when you walked on the stage tonight.
It was gripping stuff, the closest we've come to a You're-No-Kennedy moment this debate season. Trouble is, it doesn't square with prior Cheney remarks at the February 1, 2001 National Prayer Breakfast in D.C., as transcribed by High Beam Research:
VICE PRESIDENT CHENEY DELIVERS REMARKS AT NATIONAL PRAYER BREAKFAST
FEBRUARY 1, 2001
SPEAKER: VICE PRESIDENT RICHARD B. CHENEY
[*]
CHENEY: Thank you. Thank you very much. Congressman Watts, Senator Edwards, friends from across America [...]
You can check out the remainder of Cheney's remarks by clicking the "more" link below -- it's a nice little homily, actually.
VICE PRESIDENT CHENEY DELIVERS REMARKS AT NATIONAL PRAYER
BREAKFAST
FEBRUARY 1, 2001
SPEAKER: VICE PRESIDENT RICHARD B. CHENEY
[*]
CHENEY: Thank you. Thank you very much. Congressman Watts, Senator Edwards, friends from across America and distinguished visitors to our country from all over the world, Lynne and I honored to be with you all this morning.
I've always counted myself fortunate to have been raised in a part of the country where the Almighty chose to do some of his finest work. (LAUGHTER) Yellowstone, the Grand Tetons, the Big Horn Canyon, Devil's Tower, he made them. I didn't say he named them. (LAUGHTER)
Such grand surroundings have a way of keeping us humble. They help you remember that the Earth and all of us are here by the design of an intelligent and gracious creator and each of us has a purpose that He has set and that we must seek. We seek that purpose through prayer and we set aside this event each year to offer our prayers together. We do so today at a very promising moment in our nation's history, yet the true importance of gatherings like this was best- stated during one of our darkest hours by one of our greatest presidents. In his second Inaugural Address, Abraham Lincoln shows to give something of a sermon. Americans were living through a terrible war that divided the country and tested their faith. To many it seemed that their prayers had gone unanswered. Lincoln offered what was for him a point of fact, although we may petition the Almighty on our own behalf, His judgments will be made according to His own purposes and unwelcomed consequences often result when we turn away from Him.
And then the good news, echoing the psalmist, Lincoln observed that the judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether. In perils of war he had the sure knowledge that the hand of a just God moves in the affairs of mankind.
So it is, even in more tranquil times, every great and meaningful achievement in this life requires the active involvement of the one who placed us here for a reason, who knows our names and cares about what we do, and is ever deserving of our trust and our devotion.
Our aim as a country is always, as Lincoln put it, "To be at peace among ourselves and with the people of all nations." It is a goal of high purpose; so high that we cannot hope to reach it alone. So we come together on this day, people of many faiths, to speak with one voice, humbly asking the creator for a measure of his grace as we carry out the duties given to us, gratefully counting his blessings on the land we cherish and the families we love, and asking that we shall see his will be done on Earth as it is in heaven.
Thank you.